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Top Tips for Writing Erotica

Top Tips for Writing Erotica

Are you trying to conquer your first piece of erotic fiction? Well, take it from someone who has been there and done that, it is not as intimidating as it sounds. If you don’t feel like you are an especially sexual or passionate person, this can be to your advantage. Usually, those who do not lead extravagantly sexual lives can write better erotic fiction. Why? Because it takes a more to get them worked up. This can be a great asset when writing erotic fiction and turning on your readers.

The Difference Between Pornography and Erotica

If you are beginning your first attempt at writing erotica, there are a few things to note. One is the full understanding of what erotica is. Erotica is not porn. Pornography is the depiction of sexual acts in a sensational manner. In other words, think of the last porn movie you have seen. There were no emotions involved, just the deed, and horrible, horrible music. Erotica, on the other hand is the depiction of sexual acts with a focus on emotions and feelings. Some forms of erotica do not delve into the physical aspect but remain transfixed on the emotions involved.

When deciding to delve into the depraved world of erotica, stay focused on describing the emotions and the feelings. Erotica is more than just “Billy inserted part A into Jessica’s part B and Jessica had an orgasm.” Write about how Billy felt, what Billy was thinking. Is he in love? Is Jessica in love? How did they get into this position, why are they in this position? Is it revenge, is it just lust? Focus on what is motivating your characters to want and desire each other.

Top Tips for Writing Erotica

  • Remember Your Firsts

Remember the first time you fell in love, or thought you were in love. What did it feel like? Were you walking on clouds, or were you worried that people would judge you because of who you were with? Remember the feelings of your first time. Was it special, was it painful? Everyone remembers their first time, so this is an excellent way to relate to your readers.

  • Unrequited Love is Universal

Everyone has felt it at some point; it binds all human beings together. Whether it was love not felt from a parent, a loved one, or a crush, everyone knows how bad it hurts to be on the receiving end of unrequited love. Fuel your characters with your experiences. How would you change the past? Would you make your crush see what he or she was missing? Would you try to make him jealous? Would you move on? Let these questions drive your characters.

  • Write What You Know and What You Don’t

When writing erotic fiction, you should be just as aroused as you want your readers to be. Keep in mind that what will stimulate A will bore the pants off B. But if you are writing about something that is getting you worked up, chances are your reader will be getting worked up as well. If you don’t know about a particular sexual act, research it. Read other sources for inspiration and write how you would want it to be and feel.

  • Edit for Spelling and Punctuation Mistakes

Nothing makes a reader more annoyed and abandon your story at the height of their arousal like editing mistakes. When your story flows and is free from errors, readers get absorbed in the story, and the character’s feelings. When your story doesn’t flow, readers loose the connection they had with the writing. When that happens, you have lost them – probably forever. No one wants to read a story riddled with mistakes. Edit you work as much as you can.

  • Make Those Sex Scenes Steamy

If you choose to include sex scenes in your writing, go back and take a look at them after you have finished writing. Every sentence can be expounded upon. Give the readers more details, more descriptions of the event and how the characters are reacting. The sex scenes are what differentiate erotica from all other types of literature, so make it count.

  • Words, Words and More Words

Use an erotic word glossary to find more terms for the common things you are trying to describe. Use adjectives. Don’t repeat the word “cock” over and over in your story. Readers know what it is, don’t tire them out, or insult their intelligence by not giving them more to think and fantasize about. At the same time, while trying to spice up your story, don’t over complicate it with unnecessarily large or clinical terms. Is the word phallus right for your story? If you are writing sexual dialogue between a doctor and a patient during a medical exam, then yes. If you are writing about two people going at it in an alleyway, then probably not. Use your best judgment.

  • Separate Yourself from Your Everyday Environment

Nothing is harder than trying to write a sexy story with your kids running around behind you, screaming and hitting each other. Try to set the mood for yourself when you are writing. Go someplace quiet, where you can let yourself feel what you are writing. It will be easier to get into the erotic groove this way, and trust me; your readers will thank you for it.


Do you have any erotic writing tips, or tips for fiction writers in general? Leave a comment, or talk it out in the Wicked With Ink Community Forums.



About Bianca

Bianca Dean is a writer from NYC. She's specialized in writing, marketing and graphic design.


  1. Another interesting and useful article. I find that the differences between “erotica” and “porn” can be quite subtle. However, the term “porn” is generally used in a negative sense by the general media whereas “erotica” is somehow softer and looked upon as harmless / positive to describe pretty-much the same things; one girl’s porn is another girl’s erotica. Look closely and there is often intent behind the choice of words.

    Erotica is what women read. Porn is what men keep under the bed?

  2. Greetings! Very useful advice within this post! It is the little changes that will
    make the greatest changes. Thanks a lot for sharing!